The first days of a deployment find me in a haze of sorts as I sort through my new situation in life. Emotions run amok and the most innocent of comments can cause my eyelids to sting as the tears form. It's really quite embarrassing which is why I typically avoid public places for a few days.
This highly emotional state creates some interesting moments for me. I find myself doing things that would otherwise make no sense at all ... and perhaps don't make a lot of sense no matter what. So here's the question for military spouses the world over ...
Have you ever ...
- saved a load of laundry just to see something of his in the basket?
- stretched a pot of coffee over three days or more because he was the one who made it?
- kept his pillowcase scented with his cologne so you could smell him as you drifted off to sleep?
- had a flash of reality when he didn't walk through the door after work at the normal time?
- ticked off a list of 'firsts' in your head once he leaves (first night, first meal, first trip ... without him)?
- been brought to tears in the grocery store when you passed by his favorite snack?
- gone to bed with a cell phone in your hand to make sure you didn't miss his call?
- picked up the phone to call him before realizing you now have to wait for him to call?
- hit 'refresh' on your email inbox repeatedly, willing an email from him to appear?
- left your computer volume on high so you could hear the Skype tone from anywhere in the house?
- slept in his shirt so you could feel him near you?