Thursday, March 11, 2010

You Might Be an Army Wife ...

I've found several different references to characteristics of Army wives out there, but found these especially funny.  Please comment below and let me know YOUR favorite!  I think mine must be the one about showing your military ID to the Wal-Mart greeter ... I've almost done that! 

You Might Be an Army Wife If ...
  • you can unpack a house and have everything in place in 48 hours
  • you string concertina wire to keep the neighbor's kids out of your flower beds
  • your husband's work and dress clothes cost more than yours do
  • you use a crook-neck flashlight with a red lens during power outages because it's the only one you can ever find in the house
  • your children say "HOOAH" or "Roger That" instead of "OK"
  • your husband does a route recon and takes a GPS for a trip to the mall
  • you only write in pencil because EVERYTHING is subject to change
  • you need a translator to talk to your civilian friends because they have no idea what DFAS, AER, TDY, ACS, NPD, PCS, and ETS mean
  • you have a larger selection of curtains than Wal-Mart
  • you can remember where you kept the Scotch tape in your last house, but unfortunately, not in this one
  • you mark time in duty stations, not years
  • you refer to friends not only by name but by the state that they live in now
  • you know that "back home" doesn't mean at the house you live in now
  • you tear up when you hear the National Anthem, no matter how many times you hear it
  • you know that a 2 month separation IS short, no matter what your civilian friends say
  • you ALWAYS know when payday is and get ticked off if there are more than 2 weekends during that pay period
  • you know better than to go to the PX or commissary between 11:30 and 1:30 unless it's a life or death emergency
  • you show your military ID to the greeter at Wal-Mart
  • you know that any reference to "sand" or a "box" describes NTC at Ft. Irwin, not your kid's backyard toys
  • you have enough camouflage in your house to wallpaper the White House
  • you don't have to think about what time 21:30 is
  • you've ever been referred to as "Household 6"
  • you're the TC, not a backseat driver
  • you start ripping open MREs and looking for the m&ms when you run out of Halloween candy
  • you can't remember the last time you saw a doctor who wasn't wearing ACUs
  • you've ever had a pet named Scout, Ranger, Molly, Gunner, or Sergeant
  • it only costs you $50 to have a child
  • you pick apart uniforms on TV and in the movies, even though you used to fuss at your husband for doing the same thing
  • you wish you could go to CIF to DX your old stuff like your husband can
  • you've learned to sleep through the sounds of tanks, planes, helicopters, and artillery simulators
  • you give your kids a hand receipt when they take your Tupperware to school
  • you can hate military life but be terrified to leave it all at the same time
  • you defend your lifestyle no matter how bad things get because you know there's no other life for you!

10 comments:

  1. I read this and I realize that in a lot of ways, I am still a "new army wife" /sigh

    Faves?

    - your husband's work and dress clothes cost more than yours do
    - you need a translator to talk to your civilian friends because they have no idea what DFAS, AER, TDY, ACS, NPD, PCS, and ETS mean
    - you know that "back home" doesn't mean at the house you live in now
    - you don't have to think about what time 21:30 is (but then, I always used to use military time before I even met my husband, so not sure this counts for me...)
    - you've learned to sleep through the sounds of tanks, planes, helicopters, and artillery simulators (where before explosions in the middle of night meant I should hit the floor ASAP)

    I do tear up at the sound of the national anthem, but my home-country's own. I'm still new to the US - the Jamaican anthem and flag make me cry - even more so that I am no longer there.

    Looks like I have a ways to go. =)

    Thanks for this.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lol, I did one like this on my blog, but Marine wife... Yay for military wives :)
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. :-) I may only be a military brat, but many of these still ring true! :-) Even though I've been a civilian for .. lots of years.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Most of those rang true! Having had a kid both in and out of the TRICARE system, now, I can get a good chuckle at the $50 one!

    I'd love you to come by and share this post on the Military Mondays Carnival (March 15 edition) on ArmyWivesLives.com -- I think it will give everyone a laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love it! As a new army wife, I'm familiar with a couple of these, but the rest I know are in the near future for me. It's nice to be reminded to make light of it. :D

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love it! The part about the $50 for a birth is pretty close. BUT- when we had our first in 2000... there were soo many freebies at the hospital, that we figured they paid us to have the baby. We got a diaper bag, CDs of classical music to play for the baby, videos on caring for your infant, medicines... it was well over the $50 we paid to deliver.
    And, I fully concur with the curtains issue! We just moved to a different house on post mid-tour, and have more windows than we've ever had. Time to hit the Women's Shoppe for some 'new to us' curtains!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I love it! As an Army wife of 9 years, it amazes me how much the Army seeps into our lives and becomes a part of us. I think knowing my husband's social is another thing most civilians don't "get" about us Military folks. My kids call any non-Airborne soldiers, "legs." I still laugh when I hear it. You can't read this list too many times.

    ReplyDelete
  8. One of the recent "Fabulous Army Wives" posts on the BlogFrog community was about this topic, too. Check it out here: http://theblogfrog.com/1345539/Forum/11516/you-know-youre-an-army-wife-when-.html

    ReplyDelete
  9. thanx for the laugh..a lot of those apply to me

    ReplyDelete

Fabulous Remarks